I don’t know where you thought you’d be by December of this year. Maybe you had a fantastic writing year, or maybe as you enter the last month of the year, you’re feeling disappointed.

If your year was incredible, and you achieved all your writing goals, then that’s awesome. I’ve had years like that, and they’re very rewarding. If this is you, I hope you’ll leave some encouragement in the comments for other writers.

But maybe, like me, you see a big gap between where you are and where you hoped you’d be at the end of the year.

I didn’t have a bad year. The manuscript that my agent is currently pitching to editors hasn’t sold yet, but we haven’t shelved it either. Within These Lines earned out and so I’m now receiving royalty checks. (See this very old post from Jill on how advances work.) I even had an unexpected contract come my way, so I had some definite bright spots in my writing life this year.

Still, when I look at where I hoped I would be by the end of this year, there are definitely some things that I wish had gone differently. A pastor of mine once shared that when he receives feedback, he always asks, “What’s mine to own and what isn’t?” I’ve found this to be a really helpful question, even when it’s ME providing the feedback. The following six questions are a way of diving deeper into that.

What was out of my control?

This is a helpful question for me because there are things I can control and things that I can’t. Here are some examples of things you ultimately can’t control:

The state of the publishing industry

If an editor is in a good or bad mood when they look at your manuscript

The Instagram algorithm

That another author published a book this year that’s just like your WIP

If your dream agent is taking on new clients or not.

That no editors are buying fill-in-the-blank with your current genre or story element. (Dystopian, vampire books, etc.)

You get the idea. Now, are there things about this that you can influence? Absolutely. We’re gonna get to that in question six. But ultimately, you can’t make an agent agree to represent you,, or make your post go viral.

What did I give up on and why?

“Winners quit all the time. They just quit the right stuff at the right time.” I absolutely love that quote of Seth Godin’s, because it’s a great reminder that giving up is totally fine.

Back in January, I had a Christmas novella that I thought I was going to write in time for the Christmas season. But in February, I discovered that my idea was really dark for a Christmas novella, and I abandoned the project. I have no regrets about that.

Or over the summer, I worked on a contemporary YA book for a while, and then stalled out. I had hoped to finish a draft by the end of this year, but I ran out of plot. So, I’ve put it aside for now.

Maybe you moved, or school is harder than you anticipated, or you were sick for a long time. There are legitimate reasons to quit. If you thought you were going to accomplish something by now that you chose to walk away from for a good reason, I don’t think that’s something to feel bad about.

What did I learn this year that can help me next year?

Everyone stumbles. Everyone falls short, fails, or miscalculates. What makes these uncomfortable and painful experiences worthwhile is when you can learn from them.

In August, all three of my kids started full time school for the first time ever. I thought I would wave goodbye to them at school in the morning, then spend my day rocking the writing schedule I’ve been dreaming of since I had my first baby, and then pick them all up seven hours later. This isn’t exactly how it went. It turns out, when you’ve been doing life one way for 14 years, it’s a bit of an adjustment to do things differently. In a lot of ways, I’ve felt like I’ve “failed” at this new season of life, but I learned a lot about myself that will help me identify better goals and systems for next year.

Maybe your experiences this year taught you that writing a little bit everyday works best for you and is good for your mental health. Or maybe you learned that you do best when you have an external deadline rather than just an internal one.

Or maybe you had a great experience this year that you can learn from! Maybe you did the 100-for-100 and it worked great for you. Consider why it worked. Was it the community aspect? The tiny goal? My amazing weekly emails? When you’ve identified what worked, get creative about how to replicate it.

When did I feel disappointment or envy? What can I learn from that?

I’ve heard several thought leaders talk about using disappointment or envy as clues about the desires of your heart. I love this, because it turns something unpleasant—disappointment and envy both feel yucky!—into a positive.

Let’s use NaNoWriMo as an example. Maybe you’re disappointed that you couldn’t participate this year. What can you learn from that disappointment? Are you disappointed because you think the community aspect of NaNo looks really fun? Or because you would really love the time to devote to your writing? If so, now that you’ve realized this is important to you, what can you change? Do you want to find a writing group? Do you want to dedicate more time to your writing? Do you want to make sure you can participate in one of the Camp NaNo events (April and July, I believe) or NaNoWriMo next November?

Or say you’re reading a fantastic book and you’re jealous of this author’s abilities. This happens to all of us, right? Instead of wallowing in your envy, what if you instead get really specific about what’s so great about the book. Is it the way the author describes things? Is it the worldbuilding? Is it the concept? How can you “steal like an artist” as Austin Kleon says and incorporate this into your own writing?

Another example is when you read a book that you dislike, and you think, “How did this possibly get published? Why is this a bestseller?” It’s easy to feel resentful when the published book you’re holding in your hands isn’t nearly as good as the unpublished manuscript sitting on your computer hard drive. Instead of feeling grumpy and like life is unfair, what if you switch your perspective to, “Wow, if this book can get published, then I bet it’s possible for mine too. What about this book convinced editors that it was worth it? How can I apply that to my book?”

An important follow-up question to the disappointment/envy thing is, “Am I willing to do the same things that this person did to get similar results, or no?” For example, my best friend, Roseanna, sells way more books than I do. Sometimes I feel envious of this. But Roseanna also writes a different genre than me (historical romance) and works waaaaaay more hours than I do. Am I willing to change genres and work twice as much as I do now? I’m not. I’ve had to learn to recognize that I’m wired differently and I’ve made different choices.

Now that we’ve taken the time to mine the year for knowledge, let’s pivot and consider this upcoming year:

What are my knowns? What are my known unknowns?

I’m a big fan of Laura Vanderkam. She’s an author, speaker, and podcaster about time and time management. She talks about knowns, known unknowns, and unknown unknowns. Here’s what that looks like:

When planning ahead, there always things I know. Like, I know my kids will go back to school in January and be there through May. I will have pretty consistent writing time during those months. I know this. I can plan for it. And I know when summer break rolls around, I won’t have very consistent writing time. These are knowns.

There are also known unknowns. Sometime in January or February, we will likely have some snow days or my kids will get sick and be home from school. Those will be days that I had planned on writing, but won’t get to. I know at some point in the year, I will likely have several new story ideas, and I’ll need to decide if pursuing them is a good idea or not. I don’t know for sure when any of this will happen (that’s the unknown part) but I can be confident that these things will happen at some point (that’s the known part) and I can be prepared.

There are also unknown unknowns, and you can’t do much about these. This is an event like a global pandemic, or finding out that a parent is really, really sick. Unknown unknowns could also be a happy surprise, like having an AMAZING story idea that you’re obsessed with and want to work on all the time.

As I look toward the coming year, I can’t do much about unknown unknowns, but those other two categories are things that I can plan for as I set goals.

What about my goal is in my control?

“You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems.” – James Clear, Atomic Habits

I rediscovered that quote a few weeks ago, and has been messing with me ever since. The point is that having a lofty goal, like winning a Pulitzer Prize or being a best-selling author, is great. But it’s not “having the goal” that gets you there, it’s the intentional steps that you take. It’s the system and habits that you build.

I think this quote has been messing with me because I realize I’ve grown sloppy with my systems. I could use some tightening in this area.

Let’s take “Be on the New York Times bestseller list” as an example, because it’s one of my goals, so I’ve thought about it a lot. There are many things out of my control about this goal, but lets focus on what I can do.

I can pay attention the NYT list. Do you know, I had this goal for a while before it even occurred to me, “I should look at the NYT list of YA bestsellers.” Now I have a ritual of checking the list every week and paying attention to what’s on there. How many books had these authors written before? What genre of YA fiction are they? What common themes do I see?

I can write. Before any book can make it on a bestseller list, it’s gotta be written.

I can pursue traditional publication. The odds of hitting the list with a trad title versus a self-published title are much greater.

There are lots and lots of things I can do. I can learn from other bestselling authors. I can surround myself with supportive people. I can pay attention to the marketing strategies of other authors. I can continue to grow my own reach and audience. Many parts of this goal are in my control.

What about a goal like, “Finish writing my novel.” I know many of you have this goal, and it’s a great one! Here are some ideas:

Set a weekly writing goal. (I prefer weekly goals to daily.) Maybe you commit to writing 2,000 words every week. Or maybe tracking your word count is a new thing for you altogether, and that’s where you should start!

Find an accountability partner, someone who will ask you if you’re writing.

Read books about writing so that you’re staying inspired and learning. Here are some of our recommended reads.

Set up rewards for yourself when you hit writing goals. Relying on willpower alone to get your novel written is an unnecessary struggle.

Other ideas: Join a writing group where you have to turn in a chapter each week. Set a writing schedule for yourself. Tell yourself, “Before I can do X, I have to write 500 words,” X might be “check Instagram, watch Netflix, play Minecraft.”

If you’ve been feeling a little down about how this year went, I hope this post is encouraging to you. Also, we still have an entire month to go before the calendar changes, which means there’s time to make some progress! December is a uniquely challenging month to get things done, but don’t fall to the temptation of throwing the month away entirely.

Did these questions help you identify anything you want to change?

Stephanie Morrill writes books about girls who are on an adventure to discover their unique place in the world. She is the author of several contemporary young adult series, as well as two historical young adult novels, The Lost Girl of Astor Street and Within These Lines. Within These Lines was a Junior Library Guild Gold Standard selection, as well as a YALSA 2020 Best Fiction for Young Adults pick. Since 2010, Stephanie has been encouraging the next generation of writers at her website, GoTeenWriters.com, which has been on the Writer’s Digest Best Websites for Writers list since 2017. She lives in the Kansas City area, where she loves plotting big and small adventures to enjoy with her husband and three children. You can connect with Stephanie and learn more about her books at StephanieMorrill.com, Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter.