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Recently, I’ve come across something in a few different young adult and middle grade books that’s bothered me: The child character is absolutely nothing like the parent character(s) . . . and for no explained reason. Most often the way I’ve seen that done is where the kid is fantastic, but the parents are total jerks.

I won’t say that never happens in real life, but I will say there’s a very good reason we have that saying about the apple not falling far from the tree.

Now, the older a kid is, the more this seems possible. It’s a natural developmental phase to question what we were taught by those who raised us. Regardless, there is always a history behind how your character treats others. They were raised (by parents or other guardians) to believe certain things about other people and how they should be treated. That means:

Meanness has a history.

Kindness has a history.

Prejudice has a history.

Respectfulness has a history.

And so forth. How your character chooses to treat another character needs to be rooted in their personal history and upbringing, not in the archetype you’ve assigned them. (i.e. he does the right thing because he’s the good guy, or he’s mean because he’s the bad guy.)

One example of this is that Draco Malfoy believes in the importance of pure blood because his parents raised him that way. The way he treats Hermione makes sense with his upbringing. Ron Weasley has respect for muggles because that’s the way he was raised. The way he treats Hermione makes sense too.

Can characters veer from how they were raised? Absolutely. And often that’s part of your main character’s arc, them noticing a belief they have, and also noticing a better way to live.

Can you ever have a nice kid character with jerk parents? Yes! But, who did they learn to be nice from? Somebody in their upbringing must have taught them that others have value and should be treated kindly. Someone had to teach them what “nice” looked like. If you have any experience with toddlers, you know that every single kid has to be taught to share, to be kind, to wait their turn, to consider others. I’ve yet to meet a toddler who by nature is self-sacrificing, patient, or mindful of others’ needs.

Can characters treat someone in a way that’s “out of character” for them? Yes, though I would argue that it’s better to think of it as your character revealing a different facet of their personality. For example, I don’t think I’ve ever in my life yelled at or gotten snappy with a complete stranger. But I have totally yelled at everyone in my immediate family at some point. It’s not “out of character” for me when I yell at my family, it’s just a different facet of my personality. (Not one I like, either…)

Often we get the whole “how we treat others has a history” thing right with our good guys. (Though they can get one-dimensional with their goodness-for-goodness’s-sake.) But a lot of writers overlook the history of their villain. What makes them so mean? Their meanness has a history. What is it?

My favorite way to figure this out is to use character journals, also called voice journals. I first learned about them in The Art of War For Writers by James Scott Bell, and here’s how he explains them:

The voice journal is simply a character speaking in stream-of-consciousness mode. You prompt the character by asking the occasional question, and then just let your fingers record the words on the page.

Every single time I’ve done this exercise, I’ve learned things about my characters that I hadn’t already figured out. Not only that, but it’s FUN because it’s writing. I typically start with something like, “Tell me about your childhood,” and that gets me right to their history. I’ll write for a page or two, just whenever the thoughts dry up, and there’s always stuff in there that I wouldn’t have figured out otherwise.

I like to do my character journals after the first draft, or sometimes when I’m in the midst of writing it, but it’s great at any point in the process!

What’s something you do to understand your characters’ unique histories?

(Quick note, I’m out of town today and tomorrow on a road trip to Pawhuska, Oklahoma, so I’ll reply to comments later than normal!)